As we spend lesser and lesser time in writing, the quality decreases. Nowadays, writing on paper can become a “painful” exercise as my writing had gotten from bad to worse and my hand got more used to typing than writing. The writing has gotten so painful to look at that unless it is a letter to my child, I am not touching the pen and paper.
As I type more, I had learnt to let the thought flow through as quickly as possible. The slow process of thinking through and then slowly articulating every word on paper seem to be lost to the passage of time. While I lament the past-writing for its mindfulness and quality, I cannot deny that the future-typing do provide fluidity and disorganised beauty.
In the past, I usually type to myself using Futureme.org for it is always a nice surprise to receive an email from myself many years later. The surprise comes in two form. First, to discover the quality of my past thoughts and Secondly, nothing seems to have change.
I am still failing over the same stuffs and worrying over the same stuff. Sometimes I wonder if I have ever learnt from my mistakes or I am living my 20s in my 30s and my 30s in my 40s and so forth.
I have always admire Meditations by Marcus Aurelius. The ability to write and reflect is a habit to hone for life. I had been trying to write a journal daily for many years and had failed. Writing daily is just so tough for there is only so much quality stuff to say before you repeat again. Maybe that is also why I often spot the same theme in my writing for many years. There is really only a few important lessons to learn in your life and it manifest in so many forms but result in the same type of learning.
This is my first public post and hopefully this will lead to a more consistent musing and make me a better person I am yesterday. For yesterday is a day I had lived and tried and tomorrow is the day I hope will come.
Ong Wee Hiang